hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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