i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
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