its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
