I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
