She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
i believe in u and ur pee
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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