you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize