did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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