im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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