i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Randomize
