The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
