It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize