are you so shy because you have an std?
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize
