Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
