Non-Jews are for practice
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
