I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
