Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize