so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
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