I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize