sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
