Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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