'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
