Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
