Whod you bang
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
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