doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I woke up this morning wearing my tux shirt and jacket, but no pants.
______ was pissed. My breath tastes like tequila and doritos, and I couldn't get it up.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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