I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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