You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
