is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
