i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
