Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I just blew my weed a kiss
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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