You're a womanizer and a bitch.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
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