I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
