Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
