we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I have tasted many bathrooms
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
