I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
