Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
two words: eviction party
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
