I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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