If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
