Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
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