I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
she woke up with a sticky ear
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
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