Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
