i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
