these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
