The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
