NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
