btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
