apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
