i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
