she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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