i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
