so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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